update from the void
Dear readers (no one's reading this but I like addressing it to an anonymous other),
Here is a little update on my sock.
This is my first sock. Not the first one I have owned (I'm doing pretty well) but the first one I have made. I redid it to make it a bit thinner, and am a little concerned about how soft or scratchy the finished product will be, but overall, I have learned a lot in this knitting adventure and enjoy doing a few lines a day. Of both cocaine and the sock.
A little update on my withdrawal. Or tapering, I could say. During this tapering session, I started on 50mg per day of Pregabalin (known as Lyrica) and, as of last night, am now on 15mg. Originally, I was on 150mg per day, but have tapered down over the past couple of years, I think.
Despite being in the final run now, I am still impatient to speed it up - perhaps more so, because the finish line is in sight. But I must wait and be patient so as to reduce withdrawal symptoms - making little steps down of about 3mg has made side effects much easier to handle. It really feels in sight now.
Last night I had an emotional rumble and was very upset. I was upset with a friend, which is really one of the feelings I find hardest to have - I find it very painful and awful. It made me realise how peaceful things have been for so long now, staying here at G's. He works in the day in his office at home, his mechanical keyboard click clacking away like there'll be no tomorrow, and I sit in the lounge room/my makeshift bedroom and knit, crochet, watch TV, and if I'm being extra good play recorder, tidy and clean and very occasionally do my physiotherapy exercises that god I really hate making myself do. This blog post, if we are being honest, which we endeavour to be, is really one big procrastination from doing my exercises. The yoga mat leers at me from afar.
It's nice to know it's not just me that feels this way, though, and finds it very hard to do things sometimes. I know this because of a conversation G and I had with our friend and his partner, who came to visit for dinner and a movie on the weekend. They live down the south coast and so we rarely get to see our friend, although we video call him once a week or thereabouts. I had never spent time with his partner, and so it was very nice to get to know her, for all of us to laugh, and for me to see their relationship. A very beautiful, intelligent and softly spoken woman who seemed very well suited to my eccentric teddy bear friend.
As a note to my ill feelings from before, it was G who comforted me and made me feel better after talking it through with me. I found some peace after that, which was great, because it is something I wasn't sure I could get without toughing it out with whoever I was upset with. Finding peace without doing that straight away has been something I have wanted to find.
Well, it is time to do the things I am avoiding - namely, exercises and recorder practise. Thank you for this little recap as escape.
n
Edit:
I am happy to say, folks, that I am exorcised and praxised.
If you find a piece of peace, hold on
It's hard to notice peace until it's gone
Here is a little update on my sock.
A little update on my withdrawal. Or tapering, I could say. During this tapering session, I started on 50mg per day of Pregabalin (known as Lyrica) and, as of last night, am now on 15mg. Originally, I was on 150mg per day, but have tapered down over the past couple of years, I think.
Despite being in the final run now, I am still impatient to speed it up - perhaps more so, because the finish line is in sight. But I must wait and be patient so as to reduce withdrawal symptoms - making little steps down of about 3mg has made side effects much easier to handle. It really feels in sight now.
Last night I had an emotional rumble and was very upset. I was upset with a friend, which is really one of the feelings I find hardest to have - I find it very painful and awful. It made me realise how peaceful things have been for so long now, staying here at G's. He works in the day in his office at home, his mechanical keyboard click clacking away like there'll be no tomorrow, and I sit in the lounge room/my makeshift bedroom and knit, crochet, watch TV, and if I'm being extra good play recorder, tidy and clean and very occasionally do my physiotherapy exercises that god I really hate making myself do. This blog post, if we are being honest, which we endeavour to be, is really one big procrastination from doing my exercises. The yoga mat leers at me from afar.
It's nice to know it's not just me that feels this way, though, and finds it very hard to do things sometimes. I know this because of a conversation G and I had with our friend and his partner, who came to visit for dinner and a movie on the weekend. They live down the south coast and so we rarely get to see our friend, although we video call him once a week or thereabouts. I had never spent time with his partner, and so it was very nice to get to know her, for all of us to laugh, and for me to see their relationship. A very beautiful, intelligent and softly spoken woman who seemed very well suited to my eccentric teddy bear friend.
As a note to my ill feelings from before, it was G who comforted me and made me feel better after talking it through with me. I found some peace after that, which was great, because it is something I wasn't sure I could get without toughing it out with whoever I was upset with. Finding peace without doing that straight away has been something I have wanted to find.
Well, it is time to do the things I am avoiding - namely, exercises and recorder practise. Thank you for this little recap as escape.
n
Edit:
I am happy to say, folks, that I am exorcised and praxised.
If you find a piece of peace, hold on
It's hard to notice peace until it's gone
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